MONOLOGUE

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More about Earlpalooza.  No formal show tomorrow, I’ll be battening down the hatches, I may not have time to prepare.

If it’s safe to ride it out–and Niner will make that call sooner than later–Nine will be live streaming for the duration of the storm, or as long as the power holds.

TheBlaze.com

Read Glenn’s Note.

Algernon notes that The Blazer and WYRD 101 are using the same basic WordPress theme.  And, you never see Glenn and Nine in the same place.  Hmmm…

It’s another site that is going to claim to be a trusted site for objective News, but will further blur the line between what is fact and opinion, and the sheep that flock to their new favorite phenom will happily drink the kool-aid by the truckload.  And the death of journalism continues.

I got turned on to NPR a year or so ago, and I wouldn’t go anywhere else for news.  I suppose the fact that I think they are the best at what they do makes me some commie liberal.  But I also think that the people who would call me that so easily do so because they’ve been conditioned to believe it by their favorite radio talk show host, or conservative blogger.  And, they’ve never listened to NPR News

YNTS

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Woman’s Body Found Under House Clutter After Four Months – TIME

LINK OF THE DAY

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Photo Essay: 18 Places to Feel Dwarfed by Nature

Zero Tolerance Done Right

ELLIE ON ENTERTAINMENT

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Lindsay Lohan–Cop Charmer

LiLo on Her Trial, Her Career, and the Reasons She Lost Control

Prison Sentence Looms For Paris

Danielle Staub–My Ex Is A Total Scumbag

Kat Von D and Jesse James

NINE’S PEARL NECKLACE

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Something a bit personal.

I’ve been a stay at home Dad for two years.   In this day and age, I realize that people still hold some stigma for men who decide to stay home.  I’ve heard most of them: I’m a pussy, or something less than a man because I choose to let my wife work, while I raise the kids.

My response to this is quite simple:  I didn’t ask for your opinion.  My reasons for wanting to stay home are my own, and I’ll be happy to share them with you.   At the point in my life when I most needed a Dad in my life, he wasn’t there.  He was on a ship.  I don’t BLAME him for being on a ship, it was his job.  What I do blame him for, in a manner of speaking, was for always being on the warpath when he was home.   I didn’t have a Dad when he was home, I had yet another in a line of people who wanted to bitch at me and kick my ass.  The only difference was that he was old enough to be…you know.

I’m closer to Mom, incidentally.  Maybe that’s where I got pussified.  Fear not, I don’t pee sitting down, asshole.

My wife, on the other hand has a work ethic that rivals anything Studs Terkel would applaud.  She’s a great mom, but I have more of the need to be the child rearer than she does.  So I stay home, and when the kids are squared away I entertain you guys.

I. LOVE. BEING. A. DAD.    How clear can I make this?  I have three great kids, and I’m totally wrapped around the baby girls’ finger.  But, they know I’m not their buddy, I’m Dad.

But I can’t be there every second of everyday.  I want to be, though.  So, what I’m doing now is REALLY hard.

This summer, we had an experiment.  I started leaving them alone for 10 minutes while I ran to the 7-11.  Once I realized that they weren’t going to blow anything up in 10 minutes, I ran to the grocery store.  Then, I started going to pick Mom up from work.  Then, I took Mom to work, and picked her up.

Then Kim got sick, and I left word with the neighbor to check on them every once in a while, and I ran back and forth to the hospital, and sat with Kim for a few hours, about 3 or 4.   You know what?  The kids were fine.

Then a strange thing happened.  Strange, and liberating.  The kids started wanting to do their own things.  Go to the park.  I know this sounds normal to you, but as the Dad of two autistic kids, I have to say that a couple of years ago this terrified me.

My God, the world hasn’t ended.  But I also realized that my kids are growing up, and that we’re starting to do the normal things that families do.  Kids want to be kids, without their parents around.  So I’m finally getting to the point that I feel comfortable doing it. They now have cell phones, so that they have a line back to Mom or Dad if they need it.  And, they also have a little carrot being dangled in front of them about earning the other benefits of having a cell phone that get the webernets.  Grades and behavior get rewarded.

Tomorrow, while I’m preparing for the storm, we’re going to have house keys cut.   And the last piece of this puzzle….I’m going back to work.

I need to re-enter the world outside this house.  I’m cut off from the world here, and for a long time, it’s exactly what I wanted.  I’m a hermit by nature.  Crowds of people scare the bejeezus out of me, and at my worst moments in 2005, interaction with people period scared the bejeezus out of me.  I was also ashamed of the fact that I had half a mouth from the effects of diabetes.  New choppers, new clothes from the diet rewards, and a new outlook on ejecting the toxicity in my life.

I’m ready to face you all again beyond this microphone.  The sweet bonus is, the kids won’t suffer.  They’re going to be just fine.

I’m a Dad first.  And apparently, I’m a better Dad than I thought.

Imagine my surprise.

WYRD 101 is brought to you by our sponsors (those banners in the sidebar), the WYRD 101 iPhone App, and by membership support of folks like you!  A recurring membership of 5 bucks a month gives you access  to our Premium Section, stuff we don’t put in the regular podcast feed. We’d appreciate it if you would consider becoming a member?  Thanks.

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LINKS

Monologue

• Want A Raise? Wash Your Vagina.

YNTS

• City Of Atlanta Spray Painting Copper to make it easier to recognize: Thieves celebrate Christmas in August.
• There’s Stupid, There’s Brain Dead, and there are thieves who shoplift at a store sponsoring a Police “Shop With A Cop Event”.

Link Of The Day

• McDonald’s Hamburgers: Almost Entirely Indestructible

Idiotech

• No Parents Allowed: College-Exclusive Social Network Launches
• One Million Calls Placed From Gmail in 24 Hours
• YouTube Rolls Out Full-Fledged Movie Section; Shares 400 Free Films [Movies]
• Guess Who Is Trying To Trademark The Word “Face”?  (And Guess Who Is Trying To Stop It?)
• Verizon confirms Android 2.2 update for Droid Incredible hits today
• Facebook Alternative Diaspora Launches September 15

WYRD 101 is brought to you by our sponsors (those banners in the sidebar), the WYRD 101 iPhone App, and by membership support of folks like you!  A recurring membership of 5 bucks a month gives you access  to our Premium Section, stuff we don’t put in the regular podcast feed.  if you like the 40-50 shows we’re going to be bringing you in the month of August, would you consider becoming a member?  Thanks.

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And why wouldn’t it be a bunch of Liberal horsecrap? They teach that sort of thing on Liberal Pinko Commie college campuses across this great nation MAY IT”S COLORS NEVER RUN GOD BLESS GEORGE W. BUSH!

In fact, I’ve pretty much decided that anything they teach that passes for modern education has become a nefarious plot to indoctrinate our young people. I’ve dedicated at least a couple hours to this idea, which I have developed by reading several right wing blogs, listening to Glenn Beck, Rush Limbaugh and Sean Hannity. Thank God they come one right after the other. Of course, then it’s hours before George Noory comes on, leaving me hours with nothing to do but contemplate what the world would be like if there was just one guy–a God Fearing Morally upright family values Republican, mind you–who decided our laws for us. Oh, what a wonderful world that would be!

I mentioned this plot to indoctrinate the children to Marcel, who finished his water and excused himself to finish the pool cleaning. I suppose that’s alright, because he never speaks much English here anyway. I’ve always found that quite odd, since I’ve seen him on a couple of occasions at the Pump N’ Pizza ordering a pie in perfect American.

Anyway, I think this whole education thing is overrated. Homeschooling ought to be just fine! As far as science goes, I don’t understand why kids need to learn that much of it anyway, especially women. The science they need to learn is basically what cleaning chemicals require protective gloves, and that heat burns things like meat. You know what science has done for the marriage? I’ll can name that in four words, people: PEEL BACK CORNER OF TRAY.

We Should be embracing traditional values here in America, and that means getting rid of the Moral Relativism of Relativity. In fact, we should get back to things like Alchemy here in this country. Imagine a world on the brink of financial collapse being saved by the ability of turning Lead into Gold? We’d all be rich, and no one would ever have to stock their basements full of bottled water and potted meat ever again! Wouldn’t that be WONDER–

[THE REST OF THIS MESSAGE HAS BEEN REDACTED DUE TO A COMPLAINT FROM GLENN BECK AND MERCURY RADIO PRODUCTIONS WHO REMIND YOU THAT GOLDLINE IS THE BEST SOURCE TO BUY GOLD TO KEEP YOUR FAMILY SAFE. GOOD LUXK IN THE COMING DAYS, AMERICA. WE'LL SEE YOU AT THE LINCOLN MEMORIAL ON AUGUST 28TH. BRING MONEY.]

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